Count it down to the end.

Count it down to the end
In ways and a meaning it did intend
You know who you are my lucky friend
You know who you are, even if you pretend

You may not read,
But for you it has been written
To some, God Speed
To the other, the end
The end.

I

If I turned around and said
Those promises,
They were all in your head.

If I turned around and said.

II

If I asked you for a favour
To leave me alone
For now and ever

Would it be too much

If I turned around and said?

I

If time was not to heal
The wounds self inflicted
If time was not to heal
The wounds, as predicted.
If time was not to heal
If I was just to ask
If I just turned around and said,

Would you,
Would you take me to be dead?

Would you not question why
The answers would hurt
And tired I am of the lies

If I turned around and begged.

If I needed to think
Without you, without them,
Without all of the options easy, the tough
The necessary, but much too rough
Would you,
Would you not question why?

I cannot, I cannot live this lie.

If you turned around first,
And did not find me there.
If I did not want you to look,
Would you hear my silent prayer?

II

If I turned the other direction
And left you in a moment of despair
Where your need for me,
Did not outweigh my need to be
Would you understand, my friend,
That I can no longer pretend?

III

Last, if I turned and saw you there
And watch you hurt yourself
I no longer care
I am tired of the easy, the stupid, the risky, the pretense
Go now, leave me too
I am far too good, far far too good,
Only for you.

(*Drafts Closet*)